It’s Okay Not To Be Okay

BE WELL-WEEK 1-01

Listen to this week’s podcast, Be Well and Thrive-Introduction, by clicking here!

A MESSAGE FROM AMBER:

“Seriously?”

I’ve found myself looking up at the ceiling and saying this word at least once a week these days…largely due to the situation in which I currently find myself.

You see, I am at this moment supposed to be writing an article about Being Well and Thriving.

I am also at this moment a dancer with a broken foot.

I’ve been on crutches for the last six weeks and can I just be brutally honest for a second and say…IT HAS BEEN MISERABLE.

Yet, I’ve been charged with the task of discussing what it looks like to “Be Well & Thrive.”

HA!

Warning: It is possible that due to boredom/lack of physical activity, that delusion has taken over my (once somewhat stable) mind and is now manifesting itself in the form of psychotic laughter. (AKA: Feel free to take everything I say with a grain of salt, and the understanding that my perspective may be slightly skewed at the moment.)

What I’m trying to say is that I haven’t exactly been the poster child for “Being Well & Thriving” over the last couple of months. Not only have I been literally broken physically, but mentally and emotionally as well. This has been a huge blow.

Can I tell you the most difficult thing about this? Honestly?

It isn’t watching other people dance and feeling sick to my stomach that it will be months before I can perform even the most rudimentary expressions of my craft.

It isn’t the fact that I’ve had to ask for EVERYTHING.

  • Can I have some water?
  • Can you help me get in the shower?
  • Can you carry my bag?
  • Can you cook some dinner?
  • Can you vacuum the house?
  • Can you help me up?

It isn’t the pain that keeps me awake, depriving me of a good night’s rest.

Don’t get me wrong…all of these things TOTALLY SUCK. But the truth is that there is something worse.

Here it is:

I feel like in Christian culture, we’re expected to see the silver lining at all times. Like, this unwavering optimism is something that Jesus demands of us lest we lose our salvation and condemn our non-believing friends to an eternity in Hell because of our lack of faith.

But, the reality is…SOMETIMES LIFE IS HARD.

Don’t get me wrong. As believers “We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure” (Hebrews 6:19). But, does anyone ever talk about when it’s hard to feel hopeful.

As a lover of Jesus for the last 19 years, I feel guilty when hopelessness and discouragement starts to creep in.

I dwell in the inner dialogue of “if I read my Bible more, maybe I’d be more optimistic.” Or “if my faith was stronger, maybe I wouldn’t feel so discouraged.”

What I’m starting to understand though, is that part of what it means to Be Well and Thrive is to acknowledge (if only for a moment) when you’re actually not well… and you certainly aren’t thriving.

One of the many profound things I’ve learned from my dear friend Monica is this: It’s okay not to be okay.

You’re down.

Okay.

You’re in pain.

Okay.

You need help.

As believers we desperately need to break this expectation (of ourselves as well as others) to have a “look-on-the-bright-side” attitude at all times.

Let’s give each other time to grieve. Let’s sit knee to knee with the hurting and, instead of trying to paint a picture of how bright their future could be, let’s be with them in their pain.

That’s what Jesus has been doing with me the last six weeks. He’s been sitting with me. Knee to knee. He’s not saying a whole lot…BUT, He’s there.

Yes, that ever-present hope is still inside. And yes, it keeps me anchored.

But, the reality is: I am not okay. I am healing. Slowly. Emotionally and physically. But I am not okay.

And you know what?

That’s okay.

Have you ever experienced a time of emotional, physical, or mental un-wellness? Tell us about it in the comments below!